Moving As Fast As I Can

 

Bizzarre Behavior in the Casino
Some People Will Try Anything To Change Their Luck

People watching is one of the most entertaining activities in a casino. Some slot machine players go to extrodinary lengths to attempt to control the outcome of their play. Slot players in particular display behavior that is hard to believe. I enjoy some slot play at Snoqualmie Casino, a beautiful indian casino located a few miles east of Seattle. Featuring almost 3,000 slot machines, it offers the opportunity to see a wide variety of people trying to change their luck.

Many players believe that they can “control” the slot machine by fiddling with various controls. Slots offer very few opportunities for this. Most feature a slot to accept money or a casino “ticket”, another slot where a payout ticket is dispensed, buttons corresponding to the size of the bet you want to make, and a button to start the action. There may also be a “Max Bet” button that automatically bets the most the machine will accept.  So how do you make sure you will win?

That’s the fun part. A common and very strange move is Cleaning Your Money. This is done by requesting a pay out, then taking the casino receipt and shaking it in the air a few times to shake out the bad luck, then placing back into the currency slot. I have seen some people do this after nearly every spin. I guess this action provides the illusion of control of the outcome. Another common behavior is “button dancing”. People who do this will press a betting amount button, then press the spin button, followed by rapid pressing of all the other button in some kind of private sequence. Apparently the machine is supposed to respond to this. They don’t.

“Windshield wipers” are another breed of slot players. These people believe that wiping the video screen with their hands will draw out the winning combinations. They perform this ritual on every spin. A varient of this behavior is the “screen dotter”. Screen dotters use the tips of their fingers to tap the screen, apparently drawing winning symbols to those spots. Another common behavior is to “fool the machine into thinking you are someone else”.

Players will insert their players club card (a card that records your slot play and then provides rewards like free food or even money), insert money and play. If things aren’t going well, they will cash out, like the ticket wavers, remove their club card, the wait. Some will wait as long as five minutes. Then when they are convinced that the machine has forgotten them, they will reinsert their card, put money into the currency slot, and play again.

Another class of behaviors occur when a player earns free spins. Most video slots have symbol combinations that trigger bonus play, usually some free spins with better payouts. When one of these is earned, our players really get into action! By my count the most popular reaction to a bonus round is the “I am not here” move. The player moves back from the machine and folds his or her arms and pretends not to watch the screen. No matter how much they earn on each bonus spin, they sit stoically pretending to be someplace else.

I have no idea where this originated, but more than half of the players perform this ritual. Another, my particular favorite, is “frantic screen helping”. This activity consists of a combination of tapping and wiping the screen very rapidly during the bonus play. Casinos must spend a fortune cleaning off the screens.

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Anti-Social Media

I admit it. Even though I work and think at the edges of computer science, the value of social media has not reached me. A few days ago I joined Facebook. I did this more out of curiosity than anything else. I invited my daughter as a friend. She turned me down saying that she and her friends post comments she wouldn’t want her father to see. Yup, same as in real life. Where are you going? Out. What did you do today? Nothing. Apparently the parent filter remains on long after our teens turn to adults.

My feelings weren’t hurt by this rejection. The invitation was more of an effort to create a network than to learn the scary details of my daughter’s life. I also invited my wife. Thankfully she accepted. I am not sure what the implications of her refusing me would be. Within hours I received an email asking me if I want my wife to be my “spouse” on Facebook. I have a choice? Is Facebook an alternate universe where I can be a carefree and single? Nah. But it was funny to be asked. Like a good boy I immediately admitted to Facebook that we are, in fact, married.

Next thing, my “wall” (homepage?) there had bunches of pictures of my wife, me, our pets, kids, etc. I assume she put them there. Was she sending a n0t-so-subtle message to potential Facebook husand stalkers that my life is full and they should just move on? It is nice to see something there when I log in.

Naturally I navigated to her page. She has lots of friends. Most of them appear to be from Target where she works. A couple are barely out of high school. Interesting. I suppose you are probably rolling your eyes and wonder where I have been all these years. I have been rigth here, connected via electronic media to my world. It just never occured to me that a semi-public version of myself was something I would want. All this time I have worried that too much of me was discoverable. Every intimate detail of my life is stored in at least one database. Maybe Facebook and similar web sites are a way to fight back. Yes, you can uncover my credit rating, my health details, income, preferences in everything from books to bedroom accessories. Ican’t control that information. Ah hah! On Facebook I can. More »

Slot Machine Strategy

I have never been a gambler.  On a few occassions when in Las Vegas or Reno, I played the slots for a while. Here in Washington, casinos are everywhere. A few weeks ago I went to a local casino and tried the slots. As luck would have it, on my fourth or fifth try on a penny slot (50 Lions), I won $1,600. This got my attention. I played for a few more hours and actually increased my take by a couple of hundred. Very cool.

I discovered a few things that day. The most surprising is that I really have fun playing slot machines. My prior experience was that mostly playing a slot is a dull, repetitive activity with little of interest. However, the new video slots were actually fun! You get little shows, bonus rounds, all sorts of activity that captured my interest. So, I found a new hobby of sorts.

The first thing I did after that fun weekend was to see what I could find on the web. There is a lot of slot machine advice out there. Most of it is really stupid. I did manage to learn how slots work and what, if anything, you can do to improve the outcome.  Of course, I tested these theories by observation and actual play. First here is what I will discuss:

  • Slot machine location in the casino
  • Payout percentages
  • “Loose” and “Tight” slots
  • Best bet for winning (0r at least not losing much)

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My Subconscious Made Me Do It

When I started to write this blog, I had no clear idea of what I wanted to write. Just a strong desire to create a venue for myself. When I chose the name for this site, I had no real idea why Moving As Fast As I Can was appropriate. Clearly my subconscious was speaking. I have learned in my long life to listen when that little voice speaks. I have always believed that the little voice in my head was not my mother or father, but a smarter part of me hiding behind the day-to-day me that everyone sees.

Ok, we have either established that I have finally admitted to mental illness or I have articulated a personal truth. I choose the later. I can’t afford the therapy that he former would dictate. Is this to be a forum for my subconscious ramblings? Is a higher purpose shining through? I don’t think so. What you are reading, dear friend, is my account of how I am moving through the last third of my life. I have reached that peculiar point in life where I can clearly see my past and have some view of the end of my road. If I want to realize dreams and have a lot of fun, I better get going. I best move as fast as I can. More »

2010 Toyota Prius
An Owner’s Review

The 2010 Toyota Prius proves that the hybrid has come of age.

The 2010 Toyota Prius proves that the hybrid has come of age.

I have been driving my new 2010 Prius for a week now. It is a very different experience from my 2006. The Toyota Prius is the darling of the environmental set, the toy of preference (after the iPhone) of the technophiles, and the most unique automobile in the world. The 2010 Prius represents the third generation of this car.

Toyota reports that over 100 engineers have been working since 2004 (the second generation release) on redesigning the hybrid. The Prius is a gas-electric hybrid car. That means computers inside the car seamlessly change between electric, gas, gas and electric, and battery charging. The result of all this activity is that gas mileage is vastly improved. The 2010 has an EPA rating of 50 mpg overall (51 city and 48 highway).

It takes more than fancy electronics to get that kind of mileage. The quirky look of the Prius is largely the result of improving the car’s aerodynamics. The 2010 Prius is the most aerodynamic production car in the world. This is expressed as the coeficient of friction; how much force the wind puts on the car. Engine power has to overcome this air resistance. A typical (like the Camry) sedan has a rating of 0.28. SUV’s can get to .030 or more. The generation two Prius had 0.26, and the 2010 0.25. Small numbers that add up to higher gas costs, particularly at highway speeds. More »

Secrets for Successful Commercial Skipping
Taming the DVR

It’s no secret that DVR (Digital Video Recorder) owners terrify the ad industry. This device makes it simple to skip commercials. As the number of DVR owners approaches fifty-percent of the TV viewing market, the value of an expensive commerical drops drastically. Oddly, those of us who have DVR’s are learning how networks schedule those commerical breaks.
There are two major advantages in having a DVR: the machine records programs without a lot of hassle so that you can view you favorite shows anytime you want, and you can skip over commercials. DVR’s allow you to pick a program from an advanced schedule and automatically record it (or an entire series). Most let you search for programs of interest. This is great for you, but not so good for the networks. They sell ads based on “prime time”. If it is as easy to watch a program that was broadcast at 4am as it is to watch one at 9pm, it’s hard to convince an advertiser to spend more money for that 9pm spot. Also, there is the matter of skipping commercials entirely. More »

The Secret Literature of the Sitcom Vanity Card

Chuck Lorre

One of Chuck Lorre's vanity cards

Have you ever noticed the very quick (1 1/2 seconds) at the end of a tv show there is a logo shown. In showbiz speak, that’s a vanity card. It’s called that because thats where the shows creator and executive producer gets to put his corporate logo. Chuck Lorre is a sitcom producer. A producer who also writes occasional episodes and who is available to help during filming if there are problems is called a “show runner”. A more technical description is that the show runner is a combination writer and producer.

Chuck Lorre has been producing sitcoms for years. Dharma and Greg was one of his creations. For reasons unknown to anyone but Mr. Lorre, he decided to fill his second-and-a-half of fame at the end of each show with an original, and sometimes very funny essay. DVR’s weren’t available in the Dharma and Gregg days, so if you wanted to read these essays, you had to tape the show and then “pause” when the vanity card appeared. The type was small and the image jittered. Nonetheless, Mr. Lorre convinced himself that people were reading. More »

Unintended Acceleration in My 2006 Prius
It’s Not the Floor Mats or a Sticky pedal

A 2006 Toyota Prius similar to mine that has unintended acceleration problems

A 2006 Toyota Prius similar to mine that has unintended acceleration problems

(Updated 5/24/2009) I love my Prius. I have owned it nearly three years and over 30,000 miles.  It was a sunny Friday afternoon. I was on my way home from work. It’s a seven mile drive I do twice every day. I was stopped at a light. When the light turned green, I gently eased the brake pedal up. Immediately the Internal Combustion Engine rev’d and the car started surging forward. I jammed my foot back down on the brake. The engine stopped screaming. Again, I gently reduced pressure on the pedal  with the same frightening result. Next, I checked the floor to make sure that my heavy rubber floor mat wasn’t touching the gas pedal. The mat was safely under all the pedals. I tried shifting to neutral. No dice. Now , starting to get desperate, I turned the cruise control on and off. That stopped the crisis,

This wasn’t the first time I experienced this problem. On several occasions while stopped at a flow control traffic light on the interstate ramp, when I removed my foot from the gas, the car surged forward. Since I was in the clear and needed to accelerate, I didn’t give it much thought. Once I got my foot on the gas and pressed down and eased off, the problem disappeared. I admit that the behavior was so strange I convinced myself I was imagining things. Now, after the traffic light incident, I realize I wasn’t dreaming. More »

Windows 7: Evolution Or the Same Old Stuff

PC Magazine columnists spend a lot of time writng about Windows. No wonder, over 90% of the world’s personal computers use it as their operating system. John Dvorak wrote a column wondering why nothing has replaced the 25-year-old Windows operating system. This is a remarkably stupid comment from someone who surely knows better. The only thing that hasn’t changed about Windows is its name.

Over 25 years ago, Windows emerged as a shell that sat on top of the DOS operating system. This is very similar to the current Apple Macintosh OS that is a user interface on top of the freeBSD Unix operating system. There’s nothing inherently wrong with this concept. In fact, Microsoft pioneered it. As Windows evolved, it followed two paths: the consuemr version, like Windows 98; and the server version, Windows NT. While both looked alike on the surface, they were very different. NT was designed as a very solid operating system that resembled Digital’s mini computer OS VMS. It should. It’s architect was hired away from Digital.

Windows NT was designed as a powerful kernal (the heart of the OS that interacts direectly with the hardware), surrouned by various services that performed work. The user interface was one of those services. Like VMS, Windows NT could perform true multitasking. The consumer version remained a single threaded OS that continued to evolve on top of DOS.

Why does this all matter? Without getting too technical, it matters because Windows was evolving, not remaining the same operating system over all those years. Microsoft planned to merge the desktop OS with the more advanced server technology with the release of Windows XP. It didn’t quite do it, but made a lot of progress. The old bit-mapped DOS file system was replaced with the much more robust NT file system. File names could be longer. File extensions could be more than three characters. The interface with the outside world was made stronger and safer. That’s why there was so much pain getting printers and other peripherals to work with XP when it came out.
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Uncle Sam Owns Your Insurance Company

Bush Administration forces companies to surrender stock in exchange for bailout loans

Hasn’t anyone noticed that the federal government is taking over industries? Once more the Bush administration is taking advantage of pubic panic to do the unthinkable.

Treasury Secretary Henry Fowler
Treasury Secretary Henry Fowler

This isn’t the first time the administration used public panic to cover questionable decisions. In the wake of the 9/11 terror attack, Bush used the resulting panic to start an ugly war that has cost thousands of American lives. He also created the office of Homeland Security which has compromised some of America’s most coveted personal freedoms; all under the cover of public dismay.

Now, as people lose their homes over bad mortgages, the Bush administration once more under the cover of this new financial panic is taking over companies. That’s right, the Bush administration is exchanging ownership of companies for badly needed loans.

The first victim of this government takeover is AIG, the world’s largest insurer. In exchange for an $80 Billion loan package the company had to give the government 80% of its stock. Who got hurt? People with 40iK’s, retirement funds, schools and other institutions as well as individual stockholders. AIG traded at $70/share before it got in trouble. On the brink of bankruptcy the stock fell to $2 a share. After the Federal bailout, the stock hovers at $2.00, never to go much higher. Why? The math is simple. Before the crash, AIG traded at $70. When the government forced AIG to give up an 80% interest, the stock instantly lost 80% of its value. So now your $70 share has an adjusted value of $14. The current price of $2 is a lot lower, but unless the market goes completely insane, it is unlikely that AIG will ever go over $14 a share.

Congress passed a $700 Billion bailout program. The intention was to buy back mortgage-based securities; the so-called “poison” securites, thereby defrosting the frozen financial markets. The Bush team doesn’t want to do that anymore. They want to “give” the money to banks in exchange for stock. That’s right, our conservative Republican administration, you know, the guys who tell us we need less government, is taking over banks.
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